I am a box of crayons
I have many colors
each with it's own special touch and emotion.
People can break me
but I can be put back together
and continue with my purpose in life.
The box is my family and friends
To keep me in place in my life
and to keep me organized.
My sharpener is the challenges in life
With every obstacle that comes my way,
It builds my strength emotionally and mentally.
I think your metaphor poem has a good idea and you know what your looking for in your poem. It creatively compares your personality your object. Most of the comparison make sense except for the line that says "My sharpener is the challenges in my life", I think you should use another word other than sharpener. Also don't forget to add some concrete words.
ReplyDelete-Christian
I really like your metaphor poem it has very good organization on what your different metaphors are. It has alot of creativity on how you perceive a box of crayons and your own life. The parts that i would fix up is the line "My sharpener is the challenges in life", and a little more concrete words like Christian said. But all in all it is very good.
ReplyDeleteHi Tatiana,
ReplyDeleteI agree with your teammates that you did a nice job on your poem. I'm not sure that you have to change the part about the sharpener, but I do think you need to work on your word choice and your specific detail. What do crayons do? What are the colors and emotions and how do you show this in your own life?
I know you explained the comparison with the crayon box to me, but I don't think it works that well...I would just leave that part out and concentrate on the crayons themselves and how they represent you and your personality.
mrs s